betterthanispeak

Time is running! And i gotta move. Wasted minutes, days, and years, no more! These are my thoughts about trying to live a better life. It is one in which my own strenth and beauty bewilders me. Where the ptbo trio rock the sweetest most raddest advetures i have ever been on. One where i am realizing who i am now, and who i will be next. I dont stop searching. Neither should you. So read on, welcome to the crazy life and dreams of Melissa Sharon Russell.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Isnt it odd that i, in particular, post so much important stuff on here, for absolutely anyone to see? Thats weird isnt it. I may stop. Reva, i'll tell you later. hahah.


em.





So this is me right now, for those of you who havent seen me in a while....or mainly, for reva.....






Alot of things are changing with me right now. I doubt i will come out to be exactly the girl i have been, but i finally feel free, like i am finding more of hte essence of me. ( i dont believe you can ever truly know who you are)

I have realized sometimes you win some to lose some, but "sorry, i'm a champion"

I've got goals, i'm gonna get them.

Ghana

Law School

TA job

Internship

Africa

Africa

Africa.

Husband

Kids

Africa

UN

I'm comin for ya!

Em

Sunday, January 07, 2007

I admit it. I am weak. Far weaker than i let on. But, i am working on being fine with that. I am struggling right now with my body image. I know, really I KNOW in my heart, that this stuff doesnt matter. That i have friends who love me and think i am beautiful, where how much i weigh, or what i look llike in certain clothes isnt even a factor at all. i know that i love to dance, and play and climb trees, and that this doesnt define me...

but i am disappointed in myself.

I am so worried about my body all the time that in the last few weeks it has made me so cut off and isolated...

But i am a person who cant just accept things. I am making goals, good healthy goals, to befriend my body in better ways. I think that i will just feel alot better about myself if i can accomplish some of these goals.

I am making other goals too. A list of cool things i have to do within this short time frame i call my life.

Soon it will be my 20th birthday, heck, its the start of 2007 right now. I guess what i want for myself is that i start moving, get going, leave things in the past and head full speed ahead into my future.

Step one, focus on school, keep my marks up!
Setp two, get into the Ghana program. i need to get out of here, and get some perspective on other ways to conceptualize life.

There are many others steps i wont bore you with now.

I am work in progress.

Not striving. But living how i define that glorious term.

em.